Not all people turn out to be the persons we thought they were

I once knew a guy full of contradiction.

On one hand, I had been warned that this guy was no good. He changed girlfriends often, could be found hanging out at seedy places with the ‘wrong’ crowd, didn’t care much for solat, fasting and stuff, and some hinted that he might had been drinking and made out with some girls before.

On the other hand, the senior officers liked him very much because he was a well-mannered chap who could get along well with anybody and everybody. He was the eldest guy in the family and was very protective of his sisters. His kid sister could sweet-talked him into anything – including asking him to buy and send a new pair of slippers to her campus in the middle of the night. And of course, he also took up lots of responsibility around his home – grocery shopping at the wet market, fixing things, changing light bulbs, the works.

We were working in different divisions, but once we had to attend an out-of-office meeting together. By the time the meeting was over, it was already past lunch hour. However, I told him that I would like to perform solat Zohor first before lunch. He agreed and off we went to the surau.

I found him already ready and waiting outside the surau after I finished my solat. As I walked beside him in our search for a suitable place to have lunch, he appeared nonchalant as he confessed “You know, dah lama I tak sembahyang Zohor. Dah lama lah...”

I have heard from others that he did not care much for solat but hearing it from his own mouth was totally shocking! Still, I must had mumbled something that encouraged him to further confessed;

“I ni memang susah sikit. Sembahyang subuh pun cuma kalau I terjaga bila my auntie kejutkan”

My mind went something like – “Hah? Who did he think I was – Sister Confessor? Please don’t tell me all these, I don’t want to know. I don’t want to know…” I can’t remember what my response in real life though. But whatever it was, I believe I must had done something right, because since then, we grew closer. Realising that he knew he was doing something wrong and learning that somewhere deep inside he wanted to change to become a better Muslim, I gave him the encouragement and support that he craved in taking the necessary steps towards the right path.

Along the way, he became sort of an elder brother to me – someone I can tease unmercifully yet also a patient listener to my own rants and grumbles about this and that. While I reminded him to take extra care of his solat, fasting and stuff, he in turn, taught me to be more open-minded and to look at things differently from the way I normally did.

His change was apparent. From someone who wouldn’t mind having his lunch in public at some shopping malls during Jumaah prayer, he began to ensure that a pair of slippers would be ready at all time in his car boot for Jumaah prayer. While his change was not overnight, our office colleagues took notice when he began frequenting the surau more often.

That year, he quietly admitted, was the first year he fasted for the whole of Ramadhan since his mother passed away, and she had been gone for six years then. He confessed that during weekdays when he wakes up for sahur, goes to the office and breaks his fast with the family, fasting would be no big deal. Weekends however, would be altogether different since he normally spent his weekends with his non-fasting friends and could not resist temptations of having a quick smoke and tasting yummy looking food. That year though, he kept away from these friends during weekends. I even heard him telling his friends over the phone that he could only meet them after 10 p.m. on Ramadhan nights – as he would only be back from terawih after that time.

From others, I learned that despite his un-alim-ness, he has always been rather courteous, thoughtful and reliable. Once, prior to my employment in the office, there was a girl who had been impregnated by her boyfriend who had no intention to marry her. The girl was in dilemma whether to abort or keep the baby. She finally decided to keep the baby after all, wanting to be responsible for her own doing. However, upon learning of her pregnancy, most people in the office began to shun her away - except for a few true friends who stick by her, who could accept that she had committed a big sin, yet keep on encouraging her to repent and build a new life with her innocent baby. Among her biggest supporters and a major contributor towards the child’s well being was none other than my not-so-alim friend.

When another colleague passed away at 28, leaving behind a three-months-pregnant wife and a kid, it was my not-so-alim friend who took the initiatives in claiming insurances on behalf of the somewhat distraught wife of his deceased friend.

Seeing my not-so-alim friend changing into a practising Muslim while retaining his former strentghs was a pleasure in itself. I knew it was not my doing – he did it himself with Allah’s will and grace, yet that knowledge did not lessen the pleasure of seeing a beloved friend morphing into a beautiful soul.

Alas, our friendship did not last the test of time and distance well. After I changed my job, we drifted further and further with each passing day until one day I realised that I had no contact whatsoever with him.

Still, remembering the pleasure of seeing him submitting once again to Allah, working hard to be a practising Muslim, remind me that how true it is that not all people turn out to be the persons we thought they were when we first met them. Sometimes, they turn out to be so much better...